Friday, September 16, 2005

Iraqi Blues


As people in Iraq get exploded to smithereens, we speak to the one-legged man with a US$ 25 million bounty on his head, who has been giving his TerrorCasts in the media, in a fictional interview...

Telepathic Brinjalees: So Mr Abu Musab al-Zarqawi, you have done it again. After beheading terrorized victims a few months ago, and exploding a couple of areas in Iraq, causing mass destruction, fear, confusion and instability, once again you have succeeded in shedding blood in Iraq, a place noted by many historians as the cradle of civilization, and prominent for its rich history.

Let’s see what you have done in the last few days:

  • Killed more than 100 and injured about 160 Shia Muslims in Baghdad on Wednesday
  • Killed 17 Shia Muslims at gun point the same night
  • Killed another 20 Shia Muslims outside their mosque after Friday prayers today.
  • And you’ve promised to kill more.

Zarqawi: As I mentioned in my tape, it’s a war against Shia Muslims, because they’re infidels and they are working together with the Infidel Americans to wipe out us, the Sunni Muslims, our brothers, our Fighters.

TB: So you just keep killing innocent folks. Those 100-over people you killed, they were just labourers, doing their job and trying to earn some money to feed their families.

Z: Innocent? No, they’re not innocent. They are labourers who are helping rebuild the roads and buildings in Iraq with the Americans, who have to be destroyed to purify this land. And they are SHIA Muslims… during Saddam (Hussein)’s time they were kept in their proper places, but now that the Americans are here, they want back what is ours! They are taking over us. Very soon they will wipe Iraq clean of Sunni Muslims! So we need to conduct a pre-eminent strike against them. Heretics, all of them!

TB: But they’re just innocent people who want to get by in their lives.

Z: You… what are you? Sunni or Shia?

TB: Can you tell? Will showing you my arse help in any way?

Z: You rude infidel! You sit in your infidel country and watch your brothers dying here and you just sit there and listen to your iPod and write blogs and -

TB: Alright dude, STOP it. Just bloody stop your crap, man. You’re not killing people, you’re killing Islam. I think you’re the infidel, you’re the heretic who’s out of your bloody mind. You want to fight? Then declare war on those who perpetuate war and target them, not innocents whom you think are helping them. The Iraqi people have been occupied, their lives have been badly shaken, and they will help anyone who can provide with them food, water and shelter, because they are not an anarchic, power-hungry rogues like you. The fact that Islam has been perverted, ridiculed and flung into the discussions of “barbarism” is bad enough, yet you persist in seeing differences among Muslims? Truly, you’re a lunatic with intentions for worldly gain, and you make humans into walking bombs who commit the vilest of sins, suicide, in the name of Islam. Muslims around the world living peacefully with non-Muslims are taking the flak for your and your accomplices’ acts of bloody murder. You’re a disgrace to Islam and everything it stands for.

Z: You’re an infidel, you will perish like the rest. Just watch.

TB: I’ll watch your sorry arse explode before that.

2 comments:

jalsa... said...

woaw.. so much anger ..

caleb said...

aiyo...its a really nice write up but its such a serious matter that i dont know how to approach your jokes in between! i need practise. write more ;)

ha!

cheers